In the 1992 Olympic 400m race, Olympic runner Derek Redmond experienced a major injury right in the middle of his race. With a snapped hamstring, and no hope of winning 1st place, or even placing for that matter, his main determination became to at least finish the race.
As you watch the video of him hobbling towards the finish line, so far behind everyone who had already finished the race, you can see the pain on his face. But just when he thought he had to endure the painful finish alone, his dad burst onto the track-breaking all the rules-to help carry his son the remainder of the way.
There are three things that strike me in this video.
The first? How Derek tries with all his might to stay strong, as he limps in pain toward the finish line, yet the moment he turns to see his father wrapping around him, he breaks down and begins sobbing. It wasn’t until he felt that support from someone he knew truly loved him, that he felt comfortable enough to release all the emotional and physical pain that he was trying so hard to push through alone.
The second? How Derek’s father broke every rule in order to reach his son. The Olympic security tried to get him off the track, but he was relentless. He knew his son would reach the finish line one way or the other. But he refused to watch his son suffer alone, even if it meant breaking the rules to walk alongside of Derek and carry some of the burden for him.
The third? How not one single runner seemed to care about his injury. I mean, I guess I get it. They trained for four years for that one moment. Stopping to help Derek would be a huge inconvenience, possibly detour them if not derail them from their mission, as well as put their wants completely to the side.
I can’t help but relate each of these to the process of finding true, intimate community while living with a disorder like O.C.D.. For so many years, decades actually, I tried with all of my own strength to run through the pain. I watched as so many people who I thought were running beside me, continued on their way, seemingly clueless of the pain I was in. But then, true community began to surround me. And the moment I felt their presence, I released the weight that for so long I suffered through alone.
The truth is, we were not created to walk through life, especially through hardship, alone. God Himself has intimate community with Jesus and the Holy Spirit. How much more so do we, people of the flesh, need community to thrive?
“Woe to him who is alone when he falls”
Ecclesiastes 4:10
Though it is tough to admit, there have been points in my life when I experienced such intense depression and anxiety because of my O.C.D., that taking my own life did become a temptation. Especially when placed on medication that ended up harming my mental state even further.
Through that experience, I am blown away and heart broken at how easily we can convince ourselves that we truly are alone in times of distress. “No one will understand.” “No one has time for me.” “No one cares enough about me.” “I couldn’t possibly trust anyone with this.” “No one can help me.” We feed ourselves with these lies, convincing ourselves that there is no safe place for us to turn…that we must endure alone.
But what fascinates me, is that the one thing we try to avoid most, is the very tool God provides for us to get unstuck from that mental spiral. That one thing?
Healthy Community.
When true community entered my life, willing to break all the rules in order to wrap around me, I knew that I was going to finish the race I started. In my experience, the difference between a solid, healthy community and a life of isolated loneliness, can literally be a matter of life or death. Which is why I am so passionate about discussing this topic of friendship, especially in regards to living with a mental disorder like O.C.D..
For the next several weeks, I want to dive deep into community. Why do we tend to run from it? What does it take to be a healthy friend to others, especially while living with a disorder like O.C.D..? How can we become healthy friends to those who are in seasons of mental, emotional, physical, or spiritual distress?
I look forward to these discussions with you, as friendship and community truly are passion topics of mine. And soon, I hope they will be for you too!
Obsessive. Compulsive. Disordered. 