Containing O.C.D.

COVID-19.

professional sports canceling, movie premieres postponing, schools prepping to potentially be out for weeks, places of worship telling the church to stay home and stream online… I don’t know that I’ve ever experienced a global response quite like the one we are experiencing, with attempts to contain this rapidly spreading and deadly virus.

The whole concept of containing has been heavy on my mind. The literal definition of the word containing, according to the Oxford definition, is “ The action of keeping something harmful under control or within limits.”

Taking control of what could potentially be harmful, and keeping it within boundaries is our nation’s response to this pandemic viral spread. It also happens to be one of my coping mechanisms when responding to OCD.

But first, you should know what non-contained OCD looks like.

For me personally, OCD without containment looks like obsessive thoughts, that produce irrational fears, that surface uncontrollable anxiety, that leads to hard to manage depression. Compulsions may or may not occur externally. The result? Harmful destruction to all areas of life including financial, relational and social, mental, spiritual, physical, and emotional. Quite simply, I lose control of myself and the environment around me.

It reminds me of Proverbs 25:28, which reads, “ A person without self-control is like a city with broken down walls.” In other words, when I lose control of my OCD, I allow harmful destruction into my mind and heart that wreaks havoc in all areas of life. A pandemic outbreak happens internally.

The opposite of this proverb is true as well, which would read, “ A person with self-control is like a city that secures itself by building sturdy walls around it.” Containing my OCD requires a three-step process, much like the one revealed in the oxford definition: I must take control, by taking actions that put a limit on the potentially harmful situation occurring in my mind.

Let’s break this process down.

Taking control is of course the result I aim for, and work towards. With OCD, I don’t necessarily have the ability to flip on a switch and instantly take control of my miss firing/over firing brain. Sometimes, initially, I cave in to self defeat knowing that my brain does not function quite like it should. But the key is to tell myself immediately, that I can have some control over OCD and the effect it has on my life. Once I fully believe this truth, I can move forward in the process that will ultimately lead me to taking that control.

Taking action is the first step toward taking control. When an intrusive, repetitive, or disturbing thought or image enters my mind without invite, I am faced with one of two decisions. I can either isolate myself from the things that will help me move forward, leading me to freeze up inside of my mind and self destruct, OR, I can choose to take the steps I have mentioned in previous blog posts that help me re-direct and refocus those misfiring or trapped thoughts/fears/obsessions in my brain. This Step in the process is so crucial because it literally determines whether I can move out of the state of internal destruction or not.

The final step of this process is setting limits, or putting up boundaries around my OCD. For me this looks like setting a timer when I am in the midst of a triggered response mentally, and giving myself a set time to obsess over xyz. Once that timer goes off I must move into taking action through redirection, distraction, and refocusing. Per my therapists recommendation, I give myself less and less time each response. What this does, is retrain my brain to redirect all of that obsessive energy into productive coping mechanisms that eventually help me release things much faster. Medication has also been a important tool in this training for me personally.

Just as I believe our amazing scientists and medical professionals will discover a way to take control of COVID-19 for good, I am equally as confident of the ability to contain the effects and impact that OCD can have on one’s life. Both are possible though they take tremendous focus, practice, trial and error, and determination.

This process is not only helpful in response to OCD, but also to any area of our lives that we tend to obsess over, dwell upon, or worry about to an unhealthy level.

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